Archive for February, 2006
Husband eats 50-year-old chicken
I read the text of this story last week somewhere else, but it wasn’t until I saw the photo that I felt I must share this with you. Click the link above to see it.
It is mildly interesting that you can buy a whole chicken in a can in England. It is slightly more interesting that this couple saved a can of chicken from their wedding day, and only vaguely more interesting still that he kept his vow, so to speak, to eat the chicken on their 50th anniversary. What really tickled me, however, is the photo accompanying the story.
It’s not so much that he looks like he’s about to fall down. It’s not even the fact that he looks like he was just woken from a deep sleep, and came straight from bed, grudgingly, for the photo shoot. It looks like he’s still wearing a robe over his pajamas, even.
No, it’s the look on the wife’s face behind him that cracks me up every time I see it. “You old coot, you’re embarrasing yourself, and me, in front of the whole world.”
February 27th, 2006
So something happened the other day that, for the first time that I can remember, actaully made me feel old. Having two teen-age sons? Nah. One of them a sophomore in high school? Nope. Getting his driver’s license in 3 months? Still doesn’t make me feel old.
Kathy and I were watching American Idol the other day (Breanna got it right, by the way, Paris and Taylor are the two best performers by far), and something one of the gals said made me frown. She was singing “Never” by Heart (which of course is led by my all-time favorite female vocalist, Nancy Wilson), from their self-titled album (which I bought on vinyl when it was first released back in 1985, by the way).
So why did this make me feel old? It was referred to as a classic rock song. Classic rock! Whenever I hear the phrase “classic rock”, I think of Woodstock and free love, and singers and performers who’ve died choking on their own vomit, or at least a ham sandwich. (And, yes, I know the “ham sandwich” thing is a myth. It still makes for a better end to the previous sentence.)
But a song that I dug when it was brand new is considered classic rock?
Now I feel old.
February 24th, 2006
I am 37 today. As always, life itself is good (see my previous birthday posts here and here). However, in a different development from past years, I have now joined the ranks of folks who hate their jobs. I may go into detail some other time, but then again, maybe not.
February 22nd, 2006
The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.
You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
You’ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
You think a woman who is “out of your league” bowls on a different night.
Jack Daniel’s makes your list of “most admired people”.
You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, “Hey watch this!”
You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
Your wife’s hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.
Your junior prom had a daycare.
You think the last words of the Star Spangled Banner are, “Gentlemen start your engines.”
You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.
The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas is in it.
You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.
One of your kids was born on a pool table.
You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
You can’t get married to your sweetheart because there’s a law against it.
You think loading a dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
Author Unknown.
February 6th, 2006